Confusing thoughts run through my mind

I don’t know where you are; I cannot find

The person I once loved, the one you use to be

Or am I seeing at different eye levels; is it me?

I feel so hurt inside and nothing is shown out

But thoughts in my mind run and I want to shout

But it’s held in and locked up so tight

With every muscle I have, I put up a nice fight

I see what I am doing; you can’t think I’m blind

But help is what I looked for once and I couldn’t find

Hurt inside I had closed up and now I’m locked

Even if I wanted to, I can’t move the huge block

Everything is messed up and I want to be set free

But I’m caged here inside myself, the person I want to be

I’m caged behind my own words and my lies

The hurt and tears become happiness and my drive

Nothing helps; nothing comes from the others

What I don’t keep will soon become the pain of another

I can’t stop and I won’t; I can deal with so much more

Everything is closed in; I want to find the door

But the locks and steal won’t budge even a bit

The barrier I’ve built will not even lift

Trapped in my own world I don’t see much clear

But everything is bulging out and that’s what I fear

My emotions are out of order and not in line

I need another gate; another barrier I have to find

Help me out and stun me back, I don’t care

But I won’t have this happen to me; this isn’t fair

I’ve saved so many people from so much pain

And this is happening to me; it’s so lame

Nothing shown out from the darkness that I hold

Keeping everything inside was very bold

I’ve lasted this long and I won’t go back to day one

Making others worry and feel pain isn’t exactly fun

You don’t feel what I do because I don’t let you

New barriers are coming in; these are strong too

Now don’t think I’m crazy or so very out of line

Try on my shoes; what I do, you’d think it was fine

But you don’t know what I go through and how I think

So before you judge, let your other thoughts sink

I’m hurt I admit it but all the help I need I’ll get

I need my barriers to stand strong and then I’ll forget

All the pain I’ve felt and everything that came with it

I want to do this but the thing is…will I make it?


2 thoughts on “Barriers

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