I look up and see those eyes staring back at me. Filled with worry and concern, I get a deep gut feeling of guilt. The eyes keep staring, observing, watching, reading. I can’t bring myself to keep looking back; my glance quickly fades to the dirty cement below.
The words I had read the night before run on repeat through my mind; words I have not heard in a long time; words that have always been proven wrong after some time. I knew this time was different though; the person was different; the experience would be different. But even with all the butterflies that fluttered within me and the warm feeling I got, I still have my doubts.
When someone randomly comes along and gets you like no other, spends time on you like no one else, puts in effort on you when others didn’t bother, you automatically think something is wrong. After the years of torment, betrayal, regrets, and self punishment, there isn’t really a way to jump in trusting with your whole heart. But that’s exactly where I found myself.I look up into the eyes again. I smile.
In that moment, I know I’m cared for. Right then and there, I know it would be different. With them, I know it’s going to be alright.