My Escape

I miss being able to talk to you for hours and hours without end.
I miss being able to call you up whenever knowing that you’d be there without doubt.
I miss being able to go to you whenever I needed a hand to help me up or a shoulder to cry on.
I miss being able to say that my best friend is the BEST.

But, you still are…the best I know.

You put up with me when I was grouchy, when I was moody, when I was stubborn, when I was hotheaded.
You continued to be at my side through my anxiety, through my breakdowns, through my panic attacks, through my meltdowns.
You held my hand and silently let me know things will be alright when I was nervous, when I was scared, when I was anxious.
You dealt with my mood swings, my tendency to hide things, my silence…my life.

You never once told me you were tired of dealing with me and my life.
You never once said you didn’t want to be there for me anymore.
You never once stated that you regret standing by my side through all the ups and downs.
You never once…

I miss being able to talk to you, especially without knowing there’s a time limit to the conversation.
I miss being able to go up to you and get a hug because you could read me immediately without me needing to say a single word.
I miss being able to have silent conversations with you through face expressions, from both across the room and two seats away from each other.
I miss being able to give you a look and have you know exactly what I wanted or needed or meant to say.

You’d always give me your jacket when I was cold, even if I argued against it and lied – despite whether my fingers were going to fall off or not.
You’d always make sure I ate, and gave me food/made me eat if I had not consumed enough for the day.
You’d always listen to my rants tentatively and always knew what to say to make me feel better or make things work out for the best.
You’d always give me that reassuring smile you always saved just for me whenever you knew I was having bad thoughts running through my head.

You’d always make my day. Somehow.

You never once told me I wouldn’t do well.
You never once said I couldn’t do something.
You never once stated that I had failed.
You never once…

I miss knowing how much you believed in me, had faith in me, trusted me.
I miss knowing how much you knew me (like the back of your hand) but loved me either way – and maybe even loved me more before of that.
I miss knowing how much you thought I could do, how much you believed I could become.
I miss knowing how much you supported me, encouraged me.

I miss you.

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About MysteriesOfLife

“I’m a simple girl.” “You lied. You aren’t simple at all.” “Maybe I’m not. But if I said that, would you have stayed around to figure me out?”
This entry was posted in A Little Escape, Personal Favorites, Stream Consciousness and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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