Work. Work. Work. Harder.

Work. Work. Work. Harder.

Throughout the years, I never knew what I was fighting for. I just knew I wanted a better tomorrow. I simply felt like there was more out there, somewhere in the world, that was made for me. I kept looking around myself, at my peers, at my mentors, at my elders, at everyone, and knew we were better than how we were.

Today, I look around at everyone and know, maybe in the back of my mind or clearly as the features on my face, that we are all working towards something both individually and together as a whole. We are working towards a better tomorrow for ourselves, for the ones we love, for the ones who come after us, and therefore for the entire society as a whole. And, one day, we’ll get there.

The girl who is working to forgive herself for the flaws she possesses. The boy who is working towards an easier life for his family. The young lady who is working to raise her son to the be a better man than the one who left her. The young man who is working on breaking the chains his relatives attempt to limit his capabilities with.

The girl who is studying to get an A on that exam. The boy who is limiting his spendings until he has enough for that new car. The young lady who is doing her best to create a better community in which her friends feel more accepted and supported. The young man who is putting in every hour he can in order to have the capabilities to give his wife and child the life they deserve.

The girl who is attempting to forgive herself for the checkered past she remembers all too well. The boy who is trying to figure out what he wants to devote his life to and what he wants to fight for. The young lady who is simply trying to make the pain of both herself and others go away, or at least get better. The young man who is fighting to survive the health issues he has been facing for countless years of his life.

The girl who is trying to break the status quo and follow her heart’s demands and her passion’s fire. The boy who is working on keeping the blade away from himself. The young lady who is trying to bring a little happiness to almost everyone she meets. The young man who is attempting to keep to himself until he gets his own life figured out, in order to lessen the chaos between himself and others.

We are all working towards something. A purpose in life. A curiosity that pries. A passion that continues to burn. A question that remains unanswered. A better tomorrow, than today.

A better tomorrow, for the futures we dream of, the impossibles that we struggle to make possible, the wishes we all yearn for, and the tomorrow we want to live is just around the corner. We just need to continue working, keep trying, and one day we will achieve everything we doubted was even possible in the first place.


Narrow Window

Narrow Window

You were one of the very few people who intrigued me at work the first days I was there. I knew you were one of the “more experienced”, “more authorized”, or “more knowledgable” folk who have sticked around for some time. You had relationships with the others. You stuck with your group, the ones you knew, and kind of left the newbies (like me) to our own business.

You weren’t upset when asked a question, you never argued when told to help out one of the new recruits, but there was always something about your attitude that told me you had a disdain attitude about it. You were a little isolated at the same time you were connected with the other members of your “group”. It was interesting watching you interact with those who you had to call your co-workers.

When we started talking, something about opportunities I was handed led to pry a little to what could be of a relationship between you and me. Turned out you were taking one of my classes, needed help with a subject I had come to like during my first few years in school, and I could lend you a hand during a time you were struggling a little.

Today, you still intrigue me. There’s something deeper within your light-hearted attitude. There’s something darker within those nonchalant shrugs and half-chuckles.

Out of any of the new recruits you’ve seen come and go at work, I was one of the rare few you’ve ever really interacted with. Out of the hundreds of other students, other peers on campus, I was one of the people you felt like you could trust and build a friendship with. Within the hectic rush of the first several weeks of classes, you were the one person who made me feel as if I could slow down and take a deep breath. Within all the worries and stresses running through my tormented mind, something about you felt stable and slightly secure.

I don’t know if it’s chance or it’s what people call “fate” that we met during the times that we did. I met you right after I got more stable with my own life and what my goals are for the next year or two. You met me right before you made a huge change in course to your plans and your future. We crossed paths at seemingly a very narrow window where both our lives overlapped in the sense that we were changing our lives.

I don’t know if this friendship is going to last, but it’s not a friendship made by coincidence but was made with purpose. It may be a purpose unknown to both of us, but a purpose hides behind the curtains.


Create. Inspire. Enjoy.

Create. Inspire. Enjoy.

Life, in my mind right now, should always be about creating, inspiring, and enjoying. Take this as you will but I ask you to give what I say more than a second of thought.

We are constantly creating. We strive to create welcoming and accepting environments. We yearn to continue and create new technology and advance our minds in multiple ways. We create new opportunities, if not for ourselves then for the people who come after us. We create countless of moments in our lives, including both the ones we wish to relive and those we wish we never had experienced. Despite whatever we do, we are creating something. If you want the most basic and simplest form of this, then: we are continuously creating carbon dioxide when we inhale oxygen from the air around us.

We are constantly inspiring, as well. No matter whether or not you are aware of it or not, multiple people in your life look up to you to a certain extent; no matter whether or not you are purposefully trying to inspire another human being that is exactly what you do, just by being you. It can be as basic as someone looking up to you because you are kind to everyone you meet. It can be the fact that you are ambitious or passionate with something. It can be anything. Someone around you is looking up to you every single day.

And, lastly, if you are not enjoying life…then what the heck are you doing? If you don’t like something, change it. If you want something/someone, work for it/them. If you are feeling more negative feelings than positive, change the way you see the current events in your life because all it really is, is mindset. Think of that insanely hard class as your opportunity to challenge yourself. Think of that mean boss as a chance for you to be the bigger person and simply remain professional and friendly. Think of the accident you got yourself into as a lesson for your future so you don’t make the same mistake twice. It’s all in the mindset and how much you believe you can grow from what is happening around, and to, you.

Create. Inspire. Enjoy.

If you aren’t doing these three things, change something.

The Girl

The Girl

The little girl who plays with her Barbie dolls on the hardwood floor in the playroom.

The little girl twirling around in her favorite blue and green dress as her parents take forever to get ready for another office party.

The girl arguing with her mother for the thousandth time over why she does not want to wear her hair up or put any of the pretty little clips in.

The girl getting lectured over not being girly enough, and caring too much about her friends.

The girl who is more excited to help her dad build a fence for the puppies in the back, then she ever was to help her mom make dinner in the kitchen.

The girl who doesn’t have any friends at school, the one who awkwardly hides in her math teacher’s classroom.

The girl practicing her violin as much as she could in the one hour she had in music class.

The girl learning for the first time what it means to have a real friend, someone to talk to, someone to lean on, someone to laugh with.

The girl trying to figure out what she wants to study in college.

The young girl arguing with her mom for the billionth time over why she couldn’t follow her dreams and become a professional writer or photographer.

The young girl trying to learn what it was like to be in a relationship for the first time, and what it is like for a young man to treat her right.

The young girl moving onto to college and saying ‘goodbye’ to her acquaintances, learning to time manage, and struggling through the first semester.

The young girl who feels more broken than whole after a harsh breakup.

The young girl who can’t stop talking about her boyfriend, while wearing his jacket that hangs on her like a dress.

The young girl who studies in the library for hours each day.

The young girl who is trying to figure out where her passions will get her in the future.

None of these girls seem to exist in the same time frame but…in reality, they all do.


Break Through

Break Through

She can’t avoid admitting she’s slipping back into the darkness, but her heart knows it’s a little bit more complex than that. Her mind wonders, her heart seeks to find…something, someone, she will never know until it is found. Maybe it’s someone to care, maybe it’s someone to repair her, maybe it’s…simply a piece of her she had thought she had lost forever.

She knows she needs to look not around but deep inside her for the answers she yearns for. The longer she stays in the empty woods, the more piercing the cold wind seems to be. The little blows at the leaves scar her flesh; the gushes of wind knock the air out of her lungs; the heavy downpour completely disables her. She spends more time trying to recover, more time trying to survive the brutal cuts, more time trying to remain sane than attempting to bathe in the sunlight that shines above the clouds.

She looks up, through the frost and the mist, through the thick leaves and little creatures, through the rain clouds that storm onward, and she prays. She asks, what is the point in all of this because she has yet to understand. She has yet to read the book of knowledge and learn the truth.

She has yet to break through from the flames as the warrior she has always been.

Seeing you again was feeling a thorn on a rose I just picked. The scent of the scene was pleasant yet when I tried to get closer I discovered the thorn to the rose that I wanted to have once again. Watching the rose drop to the ground even before my brain registered the pain was like watching you walk away from me once more.



Wake up. Realize There’s More.

Wake up. Realize There’s More.

I’m sick and tired of being played. I’m sick and tired of being tortured, manipulated, used. I’m sick and tired of trying to make something meaningful, and getting bullshit in return.

To the young females and males out there, who know what it’s like and who are trying their uttermost best to change something about the worlds around them for the better:

I salute you. It doesn’t seem it matters how many times our hearts get torn out of our chests and beaten with wood. It doesn’t seem to make a difference how many strangers walk into our lives and turn it upside down. And it doesn’t matter how the world around us tells us to give up, because we all know, deep down in our hearts, that we will never stop fighting for good. Whether that battle be within ourselves, between our minds and hearts, or between those who we are supposed to be standing beside, we will not stop fighting.

But I’m getting tired. I have to admit, I’m getting sick and tired of all the hurt and the pain that comes from hoping for too much too soon and having too much faith in what’s not there.

When I see that there is potential somewhere, sometimes I jump at the opportunity to turn it into something meaningful right off the bat. When I see there is light in someone’s heart, that spark in someone’s eyes, I pray for them to be able to keep that for the rest of eternity. When I feel something, when there’s a moment in life where I wish I could replay it over and over again, I know there is still something surrounding all of us that is more than the everyday worries we all have running through our minds. There’s something more than what jobs we have, how successful we are money wise, or what kinds of opportunities for fame we missed; the friendships we have, the relationships we love, the human connections we live for…that is more than anything and everything that exists in both mind and body.

But…why do we, as a society, raise up the importance of “connections” in the business world and letter grades on courses about knowledge rather than human connections with one another as human beings and all those lovely moments we all wish to relive once again.

On the top of my head I can name a few:

  • The first time he called me ‘baby’ when I was riding in the front seat of his car.
  • The first time I won an art competition with a photograph that completely represented who I was.
  • The times he held my hand as we walked down the street talking and laughing about anything and everything that came to mind.
  • The times he said ‘forever and a day’ because it was a cute catch phrase he had way back when.
  • The times I’d find myself laughing so hard that my stomach hurt and all my friends were laughing just as loud around me.
  • The times my parents and siblings could finally cook a meal together without someone trying to eat another’s ear off.
  • The last time my mom told me she was proud of me, despite my having to ask her first.
  • The last time I simply sat with a friend and told them a bit of who I am and what I’m made of.
  • The last time I felt as if I was home when I was in someone else’s arms.
  • The last time I felt safe just with the presence of someone else I truly trusted.

Those are the moments, those are the things, those are the feelings we should be holding onto…not the trophies we won, not the certificates that just became pieces of paper, not that million dollar toilet painted yellow, not the labels we, as a society, give each other as ‘titles’ of our accomplishments as if the title means more than the knowledge itself.

I’m sick and tired of people laughing at, or joking around about, or teasing someone over how ‘sensitive’ they are to their relationships with those around them. I’m sick and tired of people making relationships sound like “decorations for Christmas” or “a center piece for the table”. It’s not the accessories that we don’t always need…it’s the structure of everything that is our lives and everything that should really mean a damn to you.