I spent the past two hours working on some last assignments for this past semester. I spent the past two hours shoving my screams down the drain, struggling to just feel comfortable in the silence – despite the music blaring in my ears.
But the second I finished, the second the distraction went away, everything came back tenfold.
I couldn’t breathe for a while. I could feel the world spinning around me with everything frozen in time. I could see him standing in front of me, my back against the trunk of a tree. I could feel his hands on my body. I couldn’t scream.
For once, I wish I couldn’t write. I wish I didn’t have all these confusing emotions flooding through me. I wish I didn’t have….this feeling anymore!
I want to go to sleep so I didn’t have to deal with this feeling. But even if I sleep, it won’t go away.
I want to go away.